I, like many of you gamers out there, have tried and failed when trying to share my love of games with others.  While all of us may have the best intentions from the beginning, we usually meet failure because of lack of forethought or over enthusiasm for our hobby.  Instead of adding new gamers to the gaming community’s numbers we usually only succeed in solidifying their already negative view of gaming.  With this in mind I created a short list of ways to introduce people to gaming and what pitfalls could occur while doing so.   

1. Gentle and Accommodating

Just like taste in movies, you have to respect what your significant other’s tastes are when choosing a game to play with them.  Make sure that whatever your choice is, that it doesn’t expect too much from the player right from the start.  Watching that it both satisfies their sensibilities, as well as doesn’t drop them into something difficult, will make the transition into gaming all the easier.

Things To Watch Out For – Don’t make it too easy, just because they can breeze through it doesn’t instantly equate they’ll get any satisfaction out of it.  Try to respect their inexperience and taste – don’t mock them.

2. Size Does Matter

You’re going to have to give some thought into what their tolerance will be for lengths of time between save points or time needed to complete levels.  In most cases there has to be some satisfaction of accomplishment when the person plays the game.  Whether it’s Xbox Achievements or being able to play a full level from start to finish, the game has to have some built-in situations that they can strive to overcome and eventually beat in one sitting.

Things To Watch Out For – Accomplishment is a great thing to get from a game but make sure that the difficulty isn’t too steep.  Us hardcore gamers can get frustrated and we’re already prepared for the headaches video games can be so you could only imagine what someone who doesn’t care about games can feel if they die three or four times during a boss fight.

3. Have It Your Way

Being able to customize your own avatar or gamertag within a game can be a fun addition and playing up this fact to a new gamer can only help in drawing them in.  Perfect examples of this is the Xbox 360′s Avatars, the Wii‘s Miis, and to a lesser extend  PS3‘s Home application.  But even if they personally don’t want to play a particular game, giving them the chance to make your character can make them curious as to how the person they made becomes part of the world.  This will only add another point of sharing between the two of you.

Things To Watch Out For – Grin and bear how long it may take for them to complete this process.  While it may take you three minutes to make yourself a character, it just might take them three times that time to do the same.

4. “Couch Punch” Games

Try to find games that emphasize playing co-op with others rather than just sitting around taking turns on games.  Having the ability to share in the experience together can make bringing the other person into the gaming fold go a bit smoother.  Rather than emphasizing the sometimes anti-social nature of gaming you’ll be showing off how great it is to have someone next to you helping you along with the game.

Things To Watch Out For – Make sure you don’t rip through the game without them getting a full experience of what it is to play.  They’ll feel like a placeholder rather than an active participant in the experience.

5. The Wonder Years

Utilize the different compilation discs and retro downloads that can be found on each of the Big Three’s consoles.  Many of these classic games can instantly rekindle the fun factor they enjoyed experiencing in yesteryear.  Some great franchises to revisit can run the vary from Pac-Man and Galaga to Mario and Sonic.

Things To Watch Out For –This can be a great starting point but it would defeat the point if their only want was to play Centipede for the 1000th time to date.  While these are fun to experience you don’t want old arcade games to be the only games they want to play.

6. Like Tyson Vs. A Baby

While your gaming ego may take a hit in doing so, not being too competitive while playing with the other person is a must.  You’ve been playing games for quite some time and completely dominating multiplayer games will only help to alienate your loved one.  Give them a bit of space to begin with and they just might surprise you by providing quite the opposition after getting the basics down.

Things To Watch Out For – Don’t be a complete pushover. It’ll be pretty easy to see right through your ploy to give them some wins before you whoop them into submission.  Once again respect their inexperience, don’t under estimate it.

7. My Very Own Cheer Squad

Be enthusiastic about getting them to play with you.  You don’t want to make it seem like it’s an arduous situation for you to go through.  While it may seem a little cheesy this will only help for it to be more of an experience for both of you, rather than them just sitting on a couch in silence while playing a game.

Things To Watch Out For – While it can add to the experience, try not to overdue it.  No one likes to feel like some kid at their soccer game with their mom cheering from the sidelines.

8. Backseat Gaming

No one likes someone standing over their shoulder nitpicking each and every move they make.  So don’t do the same while the other person is playing the game regardless of how many times they try to open the door that clearly wasn’t programmed to do so.  Many people learn by experience and you showing your frustration could only prompt them to give up on the game all together.

Things To Watch Out For – Give them their space but also let them know that you are most likely aware of what to do next or how to go about beating a boss.  You definitely don’t want them to just toss down the controller in frustration once they’ve hit a seemingly dead end.

Knowing is HALF the battle

While following any of the above can help make the introduction into gaming go as smoothly as possible, it’s not an all access golden key card.  It will not just instantly happen, it might not even happen at all.  Some people just don’t get the idea that pushing these buttons for hours on end could be fun.  If they continue to show lack of interest, chalk it up to differences in tastes and stop “taking one for the team” while watching HGTV when you know every fabric of your being wants to put on Spike or ESPN.

When posting pictures of yourself online you should use some judgment. It may be superficial but your picture is the first impression that someone gets about you (even before reading your profile they will see your picture). YES, a picture is worth 1,000 words. I am not sure if there are statistics yet for how long you have to catch a potential date’s attention. However, I do know that in a resume situation you only have 10 seconds to gain an employer’s attention.

Please Refrain Yourself

You should avoid putting up pictures of your chest/cleavage, etc (yes even MEN).  It sends the wrong message (if you are looking for a one night stand or just a booty call, then by all means put your chest up). However, if you really want to find a life-partner, long term relationship, etc putting a pic up of your cleavage or chest will only get attention from the wrong people. Come on girls, do you really want those emails that say “NICE RACK”. I have even heard of women that put up pics of themselves in a wet t-shirt and then get upset at guys for noticing and commenting. And on the other hand, if I see a picture of a guy in the hot tub it sends me the message that he is only interested in sex, and at that point he has already lost me and I don’t even read his profile.

Don’t Crop Out People

For those of you who think that you can crop out your ex from your picture and nobody will notice….who are you fooling? Everyone notices and it is just tacky. What else is tacky is putting up pics that your current significant other (so) or x-so took of you. Do you really want to see pictures plastered all over dating sites of your x-so that you took?

Personal experience: My so (while I was STILL with him) created a profile on a dating site (saying he was single, unbeknownst to me) with pictures up of him THAT I TOOK!! That has to be the most rude and heartless thing anyone has ever done to me.

Also, what is up with everyone taking pictures of themselves in the bathroom mirror? I guess it is just one of those things everyone thinks they should do, I really don’t want to see a pic of a commode in the background, and nobody else does either!!

Pictures You Should Use

Ok, now that I have told you what not to use, you are probably wondering what you should use. I like to see pictures that show someone’s personality. Funny and goofy pictures are good, pictures that show you having a good time, maybe doing something you like to do, these types of pictures give your audience a better way of getting to know you. I suggest that you use 3 to 5 pictures. The reason being is because each picture shows a different side of you (personality wise), plus if you have a picture that someone doesn’t see flattering usually another one will give them a different viewpoint.

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• Online Dating Sites — Advantages and Traps (online-dating.suite101.com)

So, you have been online dating now for some time (or maybe you just started checking it out) when you find someone that you really like and want to get to know. You find that you are spending a lot of time with that person and you are really getting to know them. You begin to call each other boyfriend and girlfriend and you are wondering what you should do with your online profiles?

Change Your Relationship Status

I was having a conversation regarding that with my roommate the other day. I feel that one should return to the online site and change there status to “in a relationship”, “seeing someone” and/or “just looking for friends”. I don’t think you would need to delete the profiles and still corresponding with people as friends need not be an issue. However, if you really want to give someone a chance to really get to know them you should probably be only seeing them. Of course, that is a discussion between you and your significant other.

Make Time to Get to Know Them

I guess the internet makes it way to easy to find other people to date. Don’t be a serial dater going from one person to the next.  Take time to get to know the person you are with, you may be missing out if you are constantly going from one date to another. Relationships take a lot of work and commitment, and they don’t happen over night. In this age where everything is so quick paced and meeting new people is probably easier now then ever before, make sure to take time to get to know the person you are with.

Here are a list of articles about online dating that I read that you maybe interested in:

• Social Networking: the Advantages and Disadvantages to Using Social Networking Sites to Find Dates (articlesbase.com)
• Social Networking: Social Networking Websites – is it Possible to Find Love Online? (articlesbase.com)